Justa Guy with a Camera

No Time for Photos

2006-12-29T06:50:00.000-05:00

The last few weeks have been rough, very rough. I've hardly had time to hunt for pics. So much to do. Also, not having a web presence like DA is detrimental to my motivation. It was really nice having that forum for photos. Flickr, where I have an account also, isn't nearly as good. I don't care much for Flickr, actually. The presentation is nasty. And the people are not friendly.

But I won't go back to DA, at least not submitting photos. I'm certain now that they are doing shady things with all those photos (as in making money off us) and I refuse to be part of that.

Maybe after the holidays I can start getting out again for photos.

Why I am Leaving DA (again)

2006-12-14T08:20:00.000-05:00

Damn, I did something yesterday I really did not “want” to do: I removed all my work from my two primary accounts at DA. After reading the User Agreement the other day, I have to do this. A bolt of lightning came crashing down on me from the heavens and inspired me, gave me a substantial idea about my photography, and I MUST have complete control over my own work. The user agreement indicates that if the site is sold, the new owner would be free to do whatever with all the stored art. And also, DA can ‘lease’ out access to the material to a second party, and that second party also has complete access to everyone’s work.

I did not read the new User Agreement. Had I, I wouldn’t have re-joined DA.

I have enjoyed my time at DA and hope I can find a way to extend my time and just severe all agreements with any of my past photos. In fact, I want to submit some new stuff in the near future. DA is a great show place for work. The difference is the material I’d submit in the future would be downloaded with complete awareness of the potentials with the site.

I’ve removed everything from both accounts, written to the administration, and now wait to see what gives.

I can’t be mad at DA for what they are doing. They are very upfront about it and either most people don’t care, or they just don’t bother to read the form they submit with EACH piece of work.

DEATH OR DESTRUCTION

I don’t agree with most of the people who comment on my work at DA. My cemetery work is by far the best, most creative stuff I’m doing. I think it is far more unusual than what I find in Desolate Detroit. Okay, so I’m not an Ansel Adams (though I do enjoy Nature photography), or a Gary Winogrand, or even a Clarence John Laughlin. Or a Diane Arbus, or a Stephen Shore, or a Lee Friedlander, or a Sally Mann, or any of the other photographers whose photos I adore. But I am me and I’m driven by something I don’t understand exactly, and when I’m doing that, I feel good, like I’m on track or something. I feel like I’m fulfilling an inner commitment when I go out and seek out images, and cemeteries are where I do it best. I prefer solitude in my life, have no personal friends to speak of (and want it that way) and am perfectly content living with myself. I have many interests, and interesting thoughts, and a certain sense of adventure that keeps me thoroughly entertained. I really enjoy roaming through cemeteries and just ‘being,’ noticing the sorts of things that one expects to see in cemeteries, and also noticing things that one would not expect to see. When I came back to DA this last time, I felt renewed, with fresh eyes, and I’m starting to explore images I had never imagined, getting impulses to look at objects in certain ways, in ways I would probably never have considered. A cemetery is a real place where real dead people ‘live,’ or at least where their carcasses are parked after they no longer need or can use them. I never feel ‘sad’ walking around. I think that being dead is just as real as being alive, and we can’t seem to find a way out of the inevitable.

I am working on building a gallery of my own online. This is a key part of what I’m hoping to do. I NEED to show work. It motivates me. So I’ll have to figure out something. Money is tight right now so I just might use the storage space provided by my ISP to get started. Eventually I’ll move to a stand-alone site. I have many details to work out. My biggest is how to set something up. I only have MS FrontPage and limited resources.

I shared my idea with a good friend (he just doesn’t come over to hang out, but we are friends and in constant contact via email) and he really likes my idea enough to offer me a start-up loan. I can’t accept that, but the offer means a lot to me, and it confirms that I am onto something do-able.

Yesterday I had a good shoot in one of my favorite cemeteries. It was relatively warm and gray, a good day for photos. The only complaint I have is that they keep raking the leaves, damnit. I found a few killer pics and one that almost worked. I’m going back there, maybe today, and I’m going to make it work. There is an angle with one wrecked stone and a tree, shot from the ground that I want to set up more carefully. I’m pretty excited about this shot. The ones I have are pretty damn close to what I want, but I know I can do better. It amazes me that I can go to this cemetery (and I have a few others like this one) and continue to find new shots and new angles.

So at the moment I’m a mix of very excited, working hard, but disappointed that I have nowhere to show my stuff. Flickr just does not work for me. I think it’s the presentation, the way the galleries look.

Unfortunately I am going to stop submitting better resolution work online.

Traces of my Soul

2006-12-12T10:11:00.000-05:00

DA finally Open 4 Bizz

dA Back Up -- My Fears

That was horrible, dA suffering fatal errors for over a day. My love-hate relationship with that site continues to flourish in BOTH directions. And fear, can't leave out the fear. My fear about dA is that the place isn't kosher, and at the drop of a coin, the owner will sell us all out. The wording on the agreement is vague and seems to indicate that while we retain ownership of our own art, if he ever sells the site, they then own it. The guy has already displayed his lack of scrupples in how he acquired the place: a political coup. I will contact some of the better informed at dA and see what they say about this.

Main Account

I was a busy beaver today, uploading images to all three accounts.

First off was a retro image, one that I had posted before I left DA. I remember this one of a guy sleeping in the archway of a church on a Sunday morning as I headed into downtown Detroit. I didn't have much time to take it and did manage to get this one decent shot. That's the way it is, shooting on the streets, trying to capture brief slices of life with little control over the set-up. Deep Sleep. It's so sad to see people in the city living off the streets. I am so close to that myself. It's scary just how close. I wonder often what will become of me, and then the anxiety sets in and I go take more photos.

Detroit Unplugged I love these kinds of photos, just oddball stuff that doesn't fit in...a touch of DaDa, of the surreal perhaps. How the hell does a large console tv end up on the pavement? A common icon in Detroit is the tire. Car tires are everywhere, dumped so no recycling/desposal fee has to be paid. And Detroit is about cars. Or used to be. Car thefts are huge in the city, as are car jackings. Everyone wants to drive.

Drive By I was driving back from downtown and saw this guy standing there, just watching traffic. So I obliged him by taking his photo. He just stood there, looking. I sat there (at the red light), just looking.

Dead Account

As for my dead photos, I posted a pair from my excusion in a cemetery yesterday. I was stoked by the experience, especially after I got a chance to download and view my captures.

R.I.P. I must have looked like a fool, or worse, climbing all over the headstones yesterday to get my shots. I left the cemetery with heavily soiled knees. I wonder if a policeman had driven by, if he would have charged me with statue-atory rape? (Sorry, Craig.) I'm thinking of a collection of photos by Sally Mann, a collection I do not have but would love to own called What Remains. It's about death and as I recall, there are some close up images in it. That is what inspired me to get close enough to the cold stone to feel the coldness eminating from its surface. Rest in Peace. Yes, those final words mouthed so often, and often by people who have no notion of what comes next, after death, only wishing that the soul of that departed person finds peace. I've read about that state and according to my sources, it's a state of transformation and learning.

I sometimes imagine what it must be like to view a cemetery from the side view, with x-ray vision, with all those decaying bodies laying there in the dirt. Surely whoever used them has no need for them any longer. But maybe George Romero is right and they will one day return and walk the earth. Yikes.

Erosion I adore, simply adore this photo. I don't mean because it is mine, but because it captures something I cannot talk about, and I'm sure it will get passed over. But it enlivens me, damnit.

And three photos to my secret account, which is slowly moving forward. It is important to me to see that people who don't know me, who don't come to my main page and see 32,000+ page views, appreciate my photos for what they are. My photos there are different than in these two main accounts.

But I suppose traces of my soul can be seen in those photos as well.

Dirty Knees

2006-12-11T15:31:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a big disappointment, photo-wise, but I really did not care much. In fact, had I followed my gut feeling, I would have stayed home and done something else. But I felt compelled to go shoot. Maybe it's better that I did, even without bagging more than one decent shot, a sign of will, of determination above and beyond quirky feelings.

The sushi was good. Yes, I haven't had sushi in months. Sushi and that slightly bitter unsweetened green tea I like, ITO EN. I like to find that exact amount of wasabi that halts my breathing process and clears my sinuses, and is finished in about three seconds. WHOA!

I stayed in all afternoon and finished a really poor horror movie, Pulse. I don't know what lead me to believe that Kristen Bell might do a real nude scene, not that cheesy bathtub routine she actually did. Slo-mo revealed absolutely nothing. But I redeemed myself by watching a movie I really enjoy a great deal, perhaps my fifth viewing of World's Fastest Indian. The man had a dream and in their own ways, all the people he met on his journal helped him to achieve that dream, or at least attempt it.

Today I was still waiting for the CHECK ENGINE light to flip back on so I didn't head into the city. CHECK ENGINE in Detroit might also mean CHECK SANITY, CHECK THAT YOUR PAPERWORK IS IN ORDER, CHECK THAT THE GUY STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU, POINTED THAT GUN, MEANS BUSINESS.

So as an after thought I stopped at one of my cemeteries. As I rolled up, I was immediately disappointed by how efficient the leaf collecting has been all autumn. But once I got into the cemetery, my wheels starting moving and I had some real fun, including getting down so low my knees were soiled. I really like a few of the pics I took a great deal, really oddball, unusual stuff. I think my cemetery work is by far my best stuff.

And I've come to the conclusion that the Amerikan colon is not healthy. Three times today, twice in the Salvation Army and once in a bookstore, I walked into an area where someone had just farted. They were not nice, clean smelling healthy farts, but the kind of farts you would expect from a steady diet of MacDonald's and chili dogs. A healthy diet creates clean smelling farts, like fresh roasted peanuts, not mildewed sour kraut.

I can't post any pics to DA at the moment. The site has been so screwed up for a few weeks now and she is not accepting submissions/photos at the moment. Well, all morning. Last night, too. They certainly have it together!

Books...saw an interesting book, The Accidental Masterpiece: On the Art of Life and Vice Versa by Michael Kimmelman. HERE. Very interesting, about seeing art in everyday stuff. This looks like a must-read for me, but money is in short supply lately.

Wasted Bytes

2006-12-10T14:24:00.000-05:00

Today would have been a waste of film, if I shot film. But instead, it was a waste of bytes. Not a good day at all. Had I been honest with myself, I would have skipped today. I didn't want to shoot from the beginning. One key element is the car problems I've been having, the CHECK ENGINE light popping on. That happened on Friday and I already wrote about that. The mechanic reset it yesterday and I'm just waiting for it to come back on. I did not go into the city. One thing I don't cherish is breaking down in some of the neighborhoods where I shoot.

Don't shit where you shoot.

On top of that, I didn't have quality sleep (only a few hours) and I had a headache.

My main goal was to visit Holy Sepulchre Catholic Cemetery. One of the people at DA has taken pictures at Holy Sepulchre, but hers is in NY. I am curious if these are connected, branches of one another. They are both Catholic and there is no reason why they would not be.

Photos at Holy Sepulchre are hard to come by. The cemetery is huge, covering a full square mile, and the stones are modern. This takes out one of my key eye-catchers: old stones. The grounds are well maintained and, well. boring. I've had a few successes there but for the most part, I just stop in once in a great while, just to check up on things.

I found a few potential shots but they didn't work.

Next I went up the road to another cemetery, one where I've had more success, but not today.

And finally I visited a Nature center in the area. Again, no hot shots.

Oh well. I should have stayed home.

I am thinking of putting together a slide show with music of my Detroit shots...could be interesting.

Check Engine

2006-12-08T06:49:00.000-05:00

It was damn cold yesterday, and there was a light dusting of snow on the ground. Snow can transform a cemetery, so of course I headed to one of my favorites. This one requires some walking to get to the areas where I wanted to be and even though I had a scarf and gloves, my hands were killing me after a short while. Cold has an adverse affect on me with whatever hand problems I have, CTS or whatever it is. After a short while, I was in major pain. I couldn't shoot, and it was too bright and very difficult (try 'impossible') to use the viewing screen. I didn't last long there and hit the road, and didn't take much with me on the way out, byte-wise.

I decided it was a better day to stay in the car mostly, at least until I got to a specific destination. So my next stop was a Starbucks right downtown that has drive-through service. Nothing like hot strong black coffee to set me straight. Since I was so close to downtown, I went over to one of the premiere cemeteries in the area, a double feature, back-to-back. One is called Mt. Elliott and the other, Elmwood. Both are lavish cemeteries with many of the area's most prominent buried there. Statues and large markers are aplenty in both. The grounds are well maintained and security is strong, so for the most part, the grounds and stones are in good condition. The Elmwood has more 'scenic' grounds with mausoleums buried into hills, a pond, a small wooded area, etc. I do not shoot much at either because they are so carefully attended but I was on a mission yesterday, wanting to re-shoot another angle on what I call the woolly mausoleum, a house-like structure that is covered with vines. I was just there the other day and got some decent shots from a new perspective and I liked the results. Going over the pics, another angle came to mind and I wanted to try it out. I could park close by so I didn't run the risk of getting as cold as I had at the other cemetery earlier. It was cold, and windy and my 'new' angle didn't work as well as the one I had shot earlier. THIS is that shot. I was pleased with it the other day and still am, but I'm always on the lookout to improve my material.

After that I just roamed a bit around the WSU campus area, mostly to the east of the campus, looking at old churches, wondering what it would take to get inside. I'd like to photograph in some older churches; that has been on my list of 'things to do' for a while now. One only has services once a month and looks in bad shape. The adjoining buildings give me the impression it used to be a boarding school or something. I just located some history of this church and indeed, it included a parochial school. This church, St. Albertus, established in 1872, became the center a thriving Polish community. The church was closed in 1990 but still has monthly services.

I started north and went through a little city-within-the-city called Highland Park. Oddly, HP used to be quite a nice area. I recall someone telling me it had been featured on the cover of LIFE or a similar magazine as one of the most desirable areas to live in America in the mid 1950s. It sure has slid a LONG way since then. Highland Park is a mess. I was driving through a back street, looking at various decimated houses when suddenly I saw orange: a little CHECK ENGINE light had flipped on. That was not one of the better parts of the city to be in for car problems. The car was running fine. I know that this idiot light usually indicates emission problems and opted not to pull over and call road service. ;) Just a few miles away was a restaurant owned and run by a friend of mine. I would go there. I did, popped the hood, checked the oil, the fan belt (I was getting plenty of heat and the engine gauges were not showing anything unusual) and decided to go to a repair shop just a few miles away. As it turned out, the computer scan revealed some problems with an oxygen sensor but that was working fine. The mechanic cleaned up a filthy throttle and the light is off. He informed me that my car make has mysterious problems in this area of the engine. Great. Something to look forward to.

And getting that idiot light on will open the possibilities it could happen again. When I'm driving in the worst sections of Detroit, I will be constantly glancing down at the console.

Photo-wise, I didn't get much yesterday. And DA was pretty dead. I don't know if people just aren't liking what I submitted in my two galleries, or if traffic was just light (the holidays are starting to kick into gear.) The lack of reception cooled me off a few degrees. I may back off a bit from my excursions into Detroit. I am running out of money, too. It costs a great deal to do what I do. I just don't have it. I'm living just one mini-disaster myself from being homeless, living off the streets.

It seems to be where I'm headed, too.

Nature's Way

2006-12-06T08:33:00.000-05:00

I snuck in a quick shoot in the morning before a late morning meeting with a client. I had a purpose actually, a possible re-shoot at one of my favorite cemeteries. I must say, this particular cemetery has been VERY VERY good to me. And unfortunately, what makes it very very good for me is the fact that it is so damaged, but not neglected. There is someone there during business hours. However, many of the stones have been turned over, others are broken. It is a shame, for sure.

After posting a photo of some ground cover stones, one where Mary’s eyes meet the Christ (both on different stones), I thought another angle might work nicely. The Eyes Have It. It snowed a bit the night before and I was anxious to see the cemetery under the light dusting. When I got there I discovered that the stones in question were covered completely. It is my policy not to interfere with what I shoot, so I didn’t stop. I did find another grave in the back that was slightly covered with snow, with a small angel statue and a busted Christmas ornament. I may post that one today or tomorrow. I don’t know. I’m trying to slow down a bit because I’m running into that issue with a gallery that’s too large. I roamed about in another section of the cemetery after that and really didn’t get anything I’d write home about. It was cold. My fingers were aching and numb, both from carpal tunnel, and from the cold. It really is painful for me to take photos.

After my meeting with my client, I decided to head up to a Nature center I haven’t seen in over a year. It’s well kept and when I got there, I was shocked to see how much it has changed. A new building had been erected, a large one at that. I didn’t go in because I saw a school bus pull up and I don’t enjoy noisy kids. I walked down to the pond and was immediately engaged in taking photos. The pond has a fountain of sorts in one area, perhaps to keep the water from freezing over, and part of the pond was frozen slightly, part not. Things frozen in the ice (cattail stems, logs, etc.) caught my eye and I started snapping. I enjoy these sorts of photo excursions, without people, and I’m not certain what compels me to ‘snap’ images, what constitutes a picture, but I enjoy it. None of these images are suitable for my Detroit account, that’s for sure. I posted three shots in my secret account, but I can’t reveal where that is, or it wouldn’t be a secret. ;)

As I was turning down the road leading to the center, I spotted some snow tracks off road, down is a sort of valley. Maybe they were snowmobile tracks. But it made for a nice photo and I went back and got it. I like myself when I do that, see something and go out of my way to get it.

Gas is going back up and that will definitely cramp my style. My Detroit lot of photos is pretty intact and stands as a body of work pretty much. Of course I’m always looking to improve it, to replace a photo here and there. I’d like to present my photos somewhere, either the Detroit group, or even the cemetery shots. I think my cemetery work is my best. It all felt like it was coming together recently, and after picking the camera up again this past autumn, I seemed to have a new way of seeing things, a new curiosity about what and how I shoot. It’s definitely a niche and I have little competition, at least that I know about. I’m sure there are others who find a sense of beauty and emotion within the fences of a cemetery. I still have more cemeteries around here to visit, but I have been to all within about a ten-mile radius of the city, in some directions. I looked up a local group, a place that features Detroit artists, and note that the guy who didn’t like my work is in charge, so I won’t be going anywhere with that. That guy was an arrogant jerk, and after his invitation to ‘study’ with him (probably for a sizable fee), looking at his photos, I didn’t see anything I wanted to learn from him. They were boring pictures, IMHO. I don’t just say that because he blew me off. If I would ever study under someone (and I don’t think that’s going to happen), that person would have to be someone I aspire to be, as a photographer. This guy was shy that.

Perhaps my next step, cemetery-wise, would be to acquire a super small camera, maybe one of those Casios, and attend some funerals. I’d have to be absolutely certain the flash doesn’t go off. Unfortunately, they don’t have much zoom.

I must seem like an odd sort of person, the types of things I find interesting to photograph. Death, destruction, lack of people in the body of my work…Hmmm. I don’t feel morbid. I don’t drink blood. I am not a cutter. I don’t even get spankings, or verbal abuse.

DEAD ACCOUNT

Yesterday in my dead account, I posted one called Jagged Little Pill, a photo with a broken stone in the foreground. I took it that fun day I went back to a frequently visited cemetery and just had all kinds of ideas for new angles, new shots. That all came upon me unexpectedly and I haven’t felt it again except for those two days in that incredible fog. I also posted Chariot, which I caught while driving. There was a funeral in process and the hearse was parked right in front. I exposed on the dark background because I wanted the hearse to be light, almost ethereal in nature. It worked. I only had seconds to take the shot as I was in traffic, but it worked. Of course it isn’t really getting noticed in my gallery. Better Days was a bit of a relief, with a very ‘hopeful’ looking image. I have to add those once in a while, just to keep things balanced. I took the photo a few years ago in late autumn sun and it was just incredible being in the cemetery with such lighting filtering through the trees. Whenever we have unusual and/or spectacular weather, I head right for the cemetery. Good thing – there are a number around me, within 10-15 minute’s drive.

DETROIT ACCOUNT

I posted a photo of a imploded house which I called Spineless. The odd thing is I think this same house has been sitting there like that for well over a year. It’s quite a sight. Next up was Seldon Street, one I shot right from my car while driving back from Cass Park. A guy was walking up to it so I waited for him to get in the picture. There’s a sign posted on a boarded building that says: WHOLE WHY WORLD. I like to find objects like that to add to my photos and give them a little ‘smack’ sound. And my final submission for the day was a shot of a soup kitchen, which I called God Is… . There is more around this area that I want to shoot but I think I want a driver. This is not an area I feel comfortable parking in and standing on the street shooting.

I don't know what I'll do today, though I'm sure it will involve some photography. Wednesday is a busy day at work for me so I have to be ready to go in mid afternoon. I do not need to go on shoots everyday, but it's hard to not.

Down in the Belly of the City

2006-12-03T18:42:00.000-05:00

It looks like winter rolled in when nobody was looking. I saw some ice on the roads here and there. My target time was to be on the road by 9 AM today. Sometimes I like to get out earlier to catch the first rays of daylight, but today 9 did fine. I shot about 260 shots today on my Canon S50 and Konica Minolta Dimage Z3, all in about four hours of solid roaming. I got a few decent ones, but more almost-decent ones. I will have to go back and do some re-shoots.

Today I went down the gut of the city, to the neighborhood where the incident that sparked the '67 Detroit race riots all began. One of the streets, 12th Street, the north-south street where the police raid on a late night spot ignited the city, had a make-over and is now called Rosa Parks Blvd. Rosa Parks. That was a political move, me thinks, to erase from the books the street name that is still a raw nerve for those who lived through those days in the city. Change the name, keep it black-oriented, and flip it, kill the nerve. Rosa Parks is buried in Detroit and I keep meaning to find her grave. I don't think she's on the grounds but rather in a burial vault. I'll find out this week. I wanted to go to her funeral and take pics but the city was clogged that week. It was a massive event. I think even George W Bush pretended he had respect for her that week. George W Bush only has respect (or at least that's what he calls it) for those who have more money than him, and are willing to share the wealth to get special favors granted by all of Georgie's friends in Washington. I think when he got in office, he issued all his Republican grunts a rubber stamp that reads "Approved" so they could just rubber stamp whatever he wants.

But I won't get political today.

My shots were largely off, and I just wasn't in the groove today. I'm not sure why. But I don't mind so much. My main goal today was to spread my seed over certain parts of the city. I've been dying to get down to MexicanTown and I did that. I visited one of the cemeteries in the area, too. I haven't been down there in over a year, and I really like that area. I also get a chance to shoot some white people. Detroit is largely black and it must appear to an uninformed viewer of my work that I have some racial agenda. I really don't. In fact, I really enjoy some aspects of Black culture, the music, the literature, and I identify with the way they as a culture have gotten pounded. I get pounded because I don't have a lot of money, and it is not fun. JAzz...I used to listen to a hell of a lot of jazz but had to sell my CD collection a few years ago to pay the Man.

Mission accomplished, and I do feel good about that. Plus I have about half a dozen photos to add to my mix for submission.

I've been getting some comments lately about how some people would like to be in Detroit to shoot where I shoot. It appears to be an easy process, just be here and the pictures flow. However, that isn't really how it is at all. I'd like to take a little credit for my work, and though it must appear that I drive through the city, stick my camera in the air, push the shutter and I have another submission for DA, it is not like that at all. I'd like to think it's my eye for different sorts of photos, sometimes textures, sometimes geometry, sometimes unusual combinations of shapes, words and objects, all the things I notice and photograph. I'm not the only person shooting Detroit; I have viewed a few others that were mostly unimpressive. In fact, I was watching one such man at another photo site and I saw all the pics he posted by subscribing to do so. I'd see pic and pic, and each one was so poorly executed, I had to quit watching him. It looked like he stopped in front of a burned out home, opened his window, stuck his camera out and snapped, and went on to the next.

My cameras are malfunctioning more than ever and the way things are right now, there's nothing I can do about it. Perhaps I should start playing the lotto...if I win the big one, I'll quit working and devote myself to shooting Detroit in style. I'll have my driver take me. I'll rent a space in Detroit and open an all Detroit art gallery. I already have a name picked out, but I won't reveal it in case someone reads this and wins the lotto before I get a chance to do so.

Detroit is definitely cleaning up and I see evidence of that all over the city. Who the hell is buying/renting these new places? I am pleased to say that I see white people in small numbers all over. I want Detroit to be bi-racial. In fact, when I win the lotto (I'm going for one of those super big amounts) I will move into the city, maybe buy a restored house right downtown. They are lovely, and much warmer than the new crap.

I don't know what it is, but I do enjoy a certain element of danger when I drive around.

Today I posted six pics before leaving the house, three in my main account and three in my dead account.

My pic of that lone thin, newly constructed house I've shot many times before, is drawing a lot of attention at DA. ISOLATION. I liked it from the moment I cracked it open. In fact, I had a feeling about it from what I saw when I viewed it in the camera viewer. I lightened a few areas just a bit but besides that, I did nothing to it. It was just one of those pics for me. I did that one last night. I also did another one I really liked in my dead account last night. I had shot it a few years ago and while going through my old pics, found it and re-edited it and came out just way I liked. I called it ILLUMINATION.

However, it isn’t getting noticed. Oh well. My cemetery work is all my own, no matter how little feedback I get on it.

In my main gallery, I posted an old photo I never brought out before, one of a painting of Christ on a brick wall, painted in the style of a comic book super hero, with bulging muscles and all. CHRIST IS THE ANSWER is written above it. Then I added a street people shot of a guy in the Cass Park area, checking his pulse, I think. It is an odd photo and while I had published it in my earlier incarnation, I decided not to crop it this time and leave him standing there on a street corner, checking his pulse. Now that I see it uncropped, I see that I like it much better. And finally, I posted a re-shoot of a doorway, a really nasty boarded up doorway, that has some nice texture. I’m a sucker for texture. That one I called STEP RIGHT UP.

On my dead account, besides ILLUMINATION late last night, I added another Christmas photo, a wreath at the foot of a tall Celtic cross, which I simply named SEASON GREETINGS. It is another old one I never posted before. I desaturated it a bit and it looked just the way I wanted it to look. Next was another old one never posted (I’m going through my old files, remember) of a sorrowful woman weeping at a gravestone, which I called SEPARATION. I don’t think it will make too much steam but I like it. And finally I posted one of the best photos I’ve ever taken, IMHO. It was at one of those older cemeteries last week, in the fog, a Christ figure dragging a huge cross, the one intended for him, and there is another statue, same one, facing in the opposite direction, 90° off. I did very little to this picture other than adjust the contrast a tad. I love it, mostly for the composition and just the way it works for me. I called it TWO CHRISTS. Actually, in occult esoteric Christian circles, much has been written about the existence of two separate Christ children. Steiner wrote a lot about that. I know about it and have no need to explain anything here. It’s out there for anybody who wants to search for it.

So maybe I will engage in some re-shooting tomorrow morning. I don’t know yet. That’s a long time from now.

Winter Knocking

2006-12-02T08:27:00.000-05:00

The Oil Bastards

Overcast, wet, cold...that was yesterday. However, that was not going to dissuade me from going out on a photo hunt, not as long as I have gas in the tank. BTW, I notice the price is slowly sneaking back up there. Hmmm…perhaps the oil company’s drop in profits for the quarter, not setting any new records, has them concerned. I hope they are investigated seriously and dealt with accordingly. Free gas for everyone for a year would be nice. No, not free…twenty-five cents a gallon, and then have all gas prices set by an impartial non-oil company board based on a realistic profit structure. And where the hell are all those refineries they were supposed to build? Profits are better running less at full capacity, maybe have a mini-shortage when something somewhere breaks down or wears out. The oil industry definitely affects my photography.

The bastards. The bastards. The bastards!

Maybe the real bastards are the jerk-off public that accepted those horrendous prices at the pump. We should have had massive protests and force realistic prices, damnit.

Overcast is good for certain types of shots. I like the detail, the lack of harsh contrasts. Every time I set foot out the door on a photo hunt, I consider the conditions, what would be the most advantageous use of the weather. I have a mental list of places I want to shoot under certain weather conditions.

CEMETERY

It was mostly a city session for me, though I did revisit a cemetery in the city that I haven’t visited in over a year. There was a certain shot I wanted but didn’t get. Behind this cemetery are some abandoned warehouse type buildings. I wanted the stones with the building in the background. However, it was so wet, and the grass was so damp, even marsh-like in some areas, I decided not to chance getting my shoe stuck in soft earth. I’ll go back on a better day for that. I did explore the burial chapel, as I noticed the door was ajar. No, it was definitely a door, but unlocked. This is where they lay out the casket a final time, before plunging it in the earth. The room was plain, with a few chairs set up, and a platform for the casket. While I was exploring a bit, I noticed an entourage of cars heading in, lights on. It was a funeral. I resisted the temptation to take some shots secretly. I don’t know if I’ll get to that point. If I had one of those super small Casio cameras, I’d consider going to funerals and inner city church services for some photos. I just checked and the price has come down – but – I have no money for such frivolities. Maybe I never will. Perhaps there is hope after the grave. Perhaps. I was able to snap the hearse as it made its way through the park.

The Ones That Got Away

I’m thinking more about two shots I didn’t take and what I’ll have to do to get such shots in the future. These are street portraits, cloak-and-dagger style. Since by choice I have few people in my personal life, I’m really not interested in loading up my photos with any. But some photos are about people. I had two chances yesterday I let slide and I’m kicking my own ass that I didn’t take the shot. I bet this is how a hunter feels when he is confronted with killing Bambi. I wouldn’t shoot a deer but maybe I would a person. I was stopped at a light and a granny-type lady with a few balloons in her hands was about to cross the street in front of me. She was wrinkled, and had a good face. When I signaled for her to cross (I’d wait), she smiled. If I had shot her, she would have known. The next missed opportunity came a few minutes later when I saw three people standing in the street, waiting to cross. One man, maybe in his forties, had a bicycle wheel in his hand. His companions were another man and a woman dressed in an Islamic style gown, black and totally covering every inch of her flesh. The men did not ‘look’ Muslim. In fact, the guy with the tire looked more like an ex-hippie. If I had shot them, they would definitely have known and I feared, since I would then have to drive right by them, that the guy might have freaked and threw the wheel at my car and damaged it. There is enough metal on one to cause some bad scratching. Since they were directly in front of me, I had no other escape.

What bothers me the most about this situation is that I would not like someone photographing me without my permission. I have to work on that because I have had that ‘issue’ since beginning to shoot on the streets.

I got a few decent shots without people that made the trip worthwhile. My favorite of the day (besides a few of hearses, one driving through the cemetery Cemetery Hearse , and other parked in front of a church with a funeral in session) was in the neighborhood where I shot my photo Yellow Alien, a strange thin newly built house that is popular these days in poor neighborhoods (replacing old and destroyed homes) and I saw it in a new light, down the street with no buildings near it. Isolation. The absurdity for the day was a pole off the edge of the street with three ads nailed to it, one for metal caskets, another for plaster/painting, and the third for trash removal. Very telling for the inner city. Pole Ads.

Last night I was going to try my hand at some night photography. That crazed man who has WAY too many Christmas ornaments was all lit up and it is a remarkable sight. However, it was wet and cold last night and I figure I can get that some other day. I drove by it yesterday evening after the sun went down and people do stop and look. That’s when I had the idea of trying some night shots. I’d like to capture the depth of field with all those little lights. I’ve never done any night work seriously, other than shooting the moon, in a manner of speaking.

Winter is just around the corner. We had unseasonably warm weather earlier in the week but yesterday chill rolled in. I think it will be here all weekend, too.

My DA galleries go slowly. I shouldn’t complain because I see so many good photographers who get passed over there. It is really difficult getting noticed. I was fortunate in that my work caught on during a time when I first joined and I was getting incredible hits, something like a hundred messages in a single day. That didn’t suit me at all because I do like to respond to people who take the time to check me out. I was getting into occasional squabbles about critiques; that was before DA offered us the opportunity to indicate some of us are not interested in them. I think that turned off some people, which is fine with me. I’d rather be a dirty little secret in the corner than a DA superstar, not that my photos warrant that.

What is a page view? I have no idea. I see that when someone accesses my photos through their deviation folder, deviations of people whom they subscribed to viewing, there is no page view. My main account has had 32,031 views to date. My new cemetery account is at 383, and my secret account is crawling along at 63. But what does that mean? Do I care? Yes, in the sense that I want people to view my photos or I wouldn’t post them, but does having more page views give me a larger penis? I don’t think so. Just out of curiosity, I wonder what my page view count would have been had I not deleted everything and took over a year off from DA? Wait, that’s getting into the sort of thinking where I’m hoping more pages views give me a bigger dick, and I don’t want that. The ego traps are plenty, aren’t they?

It’s Saturday. I work, not shoot, though I do have the morning off. However, I do not feel particularly inspired to go out into the cold gray right now, since I still have some stuff I like in holding that has not been published yet.

I'm glad I have comments disabled here. I'm sure there are some sick people out there who would want to comment most on those missed photo opportunities. Heh heh...

Verteran's Sacrifice/Jewish Cemeteries

2006-11-29T23:01:00.000-05:00

Today I was not able to hit the road early for some pics. It just didn't work out that way. However, I really didn't mind because I met a friend for coffee instead. That was nice. Afterwards, I did want some photos and had my heart set on exploring a few Jewish cemeteries in the area. I've been to two of them before and one was very interesting. One, I had really not visited. That one is small and on a square lot with just a simple house type structure in the middle. Very simple. I saw workers cutting the lawn and gathering leaves so I decided not to visit. I drove through the next one (all three are side by side) and decided to revisit one that had been quite good to me in the past, offering me a few really decent shots to capture. I parked and went in.

Most of the stones are rather tall and many have flower beds built in front. They are tightly packed and walking through can be a tad difficult. I was after a decent photo of stones left on top of the gravestones. That is a sign that someone has been to visit that grave. I shot one a few years ago and wanted to update it. Besides, when I was out at that historic cemetery, I found stones sitting on top an engraved bench/table. The inscriptions are touching and I wanted to link the two. The one I saw on Monday is not in a Jewish cemetery. I do not recall a single Jewish grave there. Perhaps the custom of leaving stones is practiced by other cultures as well. I don't know. Or perhaps the family members saw it in "Scheindler's List" and thought it was a good thing. I don't know.

I never did get the stone shot I want; I'll have to go back another time. The most interesting find were these oval and circular portrait plaques, quite old at that. Some were protected by a global covering that distorted the faces. I had quite a time of getting in really close for some interesting shots and I definitely want to experiment more with these most unusual items. I got some other good shots and felt it was a most worthwhile visit. There are other Jewish cemeteries a bit away from my house and one day I just must visit them. They have been on my list for some time now.

Before I met my friend for coffee, I did a brief visit to another cemetery just five minutes from my house. I went to the veteran's area and walked around and took some shots. Many of the graves were from the two World Wars and also the Spanish American War. It got me thinking about sacrifice and how Americans used to be very noble and honorable people, willing to sacrifice her own soldiers to aid those in desperate need. The sad part of this is the senseless occupation of Iraq my country is now engaged in, in a conflict propegated by a group of men who themselves evaded the draft: George Bush, Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld. Hopefully soon war profiteering investigations will begin and hopefully the Amerikan people will demand a thorough investigation and anybody found guilty of such treasonous crimes duly punished. I thought about all the dead beneath the ground on which I walked and the sacrifice they made, believing in an Amerika we once were. Hopefully some day we can return that fulfill our true destiny.

Warm, Sunny...going Downtown

2006-11-26T21:32:00.000-05:00

Watta Day. It started off a bit slow, and in fact my heart was not really into heading out the door. I have plenty of images to submit and if I mix in some of my material from 2-3 years ago, I could go on for quite a while and submit on a regular basis.

Submitting on a regular basis...is a problem for me. I have a habit of submitting a lot of photos but I don't want to have a monster gallery again. I have to come up with a strategy of how to submit regularly but keep my gallery manageable.

So, I did get out finally, around 9, and picked up a necessary cup of hot coffee. The caffeine rush keeps me on the edge, like I need to be when roaming the streets of Detroit. I headed to the east side and things were definitely NOT popping. As I already said, I was only half into it, so I made a conscious agreement with myself that if I could manage three decent images, it would be a successful trip. On a normal decent day I usually get 2-4 really good shots plus perhaps 6 or more decent enough photos to show. I've been combing a few areas heavily and wanted to break out. The early stuff was, as I said, slow. I found a few shots, took them, and then drove around a little airport right in the middle of the city. Not a whole lot was happening there but I did see a plane that was quite a wreck. It didn't appear to be crashed, just partly ripped down. I decided not to stop. Next stop, though, was one of the cemeteries I haven't visited in a while. Not much there, and besides, I really wasn't in a cemetery state of mind today. Then I started combing some of the neighborhoods in disrepair. There are quite a few, but there are also a substantial number of good, clean, healthy sections. I've posted images of those neighborhoods before and received very little interest. Nope, it is the blood and guts everyone wants to see. I care about the city, and that is probably the difference (why I want to show better areas.)

Next stop was a cemetery, but I had a mission. There is a grave marker there that caught my eye and I needed to reshoot it. Obviously the family cannot afford a fancy stone marker so someone made one up of plywood with permanent marker. The grave is in the back near the fence and its location is what I want to be careful about, not including too much (or any) background noise in the shot. As it turned out, I didn't get my shot because I glanced over at the adjacent grave and saw some plastic figurines perched on the stone platform. They looked like plastic or some material I don't recognize but have definitely seen before. Each piece had three people sitting in pews. It was freaky, actually, and I definitely couldn't let this one get away so I shot quite a few exposures, not wanting to come back and do it again. I got it. I'll post that in my 'dead' account hopefully tomorrow.

Hopefully tomorrow...DA still a bite in the ass. It has not worked even close to normal for days now. I wish they'd just shut it down and fix it. My guess is that they get their guys to write code for the site and install it before debugging it, allowing all our complaints to guide them in fixing it. However, DA is never stable, never without serious issues.

After the quick stop at the cemetery, I started heading down, eventually hitting the upper downtown region. And with many stops on the way, a burned out gas station and other urban delights. I drove past the open field where Paul used to live. Paul was (is?) a homeless man I was trying to photograph. He lived in an open field and one day he yelled to me to get him something to eat. I would drop off burgers for him when I went down that way. He hasn't been there for some time now. I recall about a year ago I drove by and he was already gone. Paul loved to read and I brought him books. Once he asked me for $5 so he could get laid. He had a particular lady in mind. I know there were a lot of crack whores around there and he probably knew some of them by name. I don't think Paul was a drug user, but I did sense he had a touch of the crazy. Every once in a while during talk, he'd start ranting and raving about different topics, a mix between hell and damnation Christianity and voodoo.

Downtown was interesting. It had been over a year since I've explored some of these areas. I hit one pocket of older mansions, most of which were brought down long ago. Most of those remaining were severely damaged, some beyond recognition. Many are in one stage or another of renovation. And there are quite a few brand new condos going up around there, too. The area is undergoing some restructure, I believe. I wonder where the desperately poor will go because what's going in looks fairly upbeat and probably costly. I'm thinking young yuppies who work downtown are moving into these houses. This is wonderful news about Detroit fighting back, though I don't imagine many who watch my Detroit work will be pleased. The good news (for them) is it will definitely take time. I am excited to start documenting some of this new growth and renovations.

On the way back, I decided to stop at a little vegetarian cafe I meant to visit. I know the man who owns and runs the place. He is a chiropractor and does his business in the same building, or perhaps in another building next door. I didn't ask. The place was quaint and comfortable and I definitely will be going back for 1) photos, 2) food. Bob and his friend were eating a fava bean soup and I asked if he minded if I photographed them. I did and got a few decent frames. And I got more, a cat on the ledge, a nice painting by the window, some unusual statues outside the front door. It was a great way to finish off a better than average shooting session. I won't be posting many of these to my main account because 'happy' pictures just fall flat there. I do have a secret place where I will be showing them, however. Heh heh. Yeah, I know...secret squirrel.

I have to start thinking about a gift for myself. Borders has a 'rewards' program and I guess I've been inadvertently building up a decent rewards bonus. I have nearly $29 credit. Of course, whatever I get will be photography related. I've got to get in and see what's on the shelf.

Mental Fog Today

2006-11-25T20:58:00.000-05:00

What a swirling day of confusion. Not uncommon for a sleepless night. I must sleep tonight or I think I’ll slit my throat.

In a fog I went out this morning, even though no fog was to be found outside. The dew had frozen and that creates a look all its own. I tried to capture that and even if I didn’t, I enjoyed the experience of walking around a city part freezing my ass off, looking for morning elementals. I headed to a second small park afterwards and shot some frosted swings and a bench at the baseball diamond. That was not enough to satisfy my urge to shoot so I stopped in at a cemetery that is just minutes away. I’ve been there a lot in the past and I shot some decent photos there over the past few years. I wasn’t expecting too much at all. The time was more walking around and looking than acquiring more photos. I did manage a few possible submissions and I went home and downloaded the images, edited a few, not that I have anywhere to put them. I have another leg of shooting that also does not fit in with either my cemetery photos or my mostly-devastated Detroit pics. I even entertained the notion of a third gallery. Naw!

I had to be at work today at 2, so a quick sweep through a small area of the city for some reshoots was definitely in order. I hoped on the X-way and in a matter of minutes I was way across town. Going that far before the X-way would have felt like hours. Maybe it would have taken that long, but not anymore.

I’m too foggy to go on.

In the Thick of it (fog)

2006-11-24T20:06:00.000-05:00

Today was another decent day for shooting. The forecast was fog, thick fog. I went out and headed over to a few cemeteries. I was heading over in the direction of the one I shot the other day in fog (a MOST successful shoot, I might add) but thought I would hit a few others first that are not much more than a mile or so away. Detroit has quite a few cemeteries, really. When I got to the first stop, I found a little but nothing that made me screech to a halt. And the fog wasn't that thick; I think it was thicker earlier in the week, that first time I went to my favorite cemetery. After the first stop, I headed north to another that is about .5 miles away. Not too much going on there, but I did manage a few shots that get my seal of approval. This one has many angel statues and is well guarded and maintained, so it is not abused like a few of the others I visit. I see security driving through the grounds quite a bit. Again, the fog wasn't too thick, but it did help in a few shots. Fog is really good for getting rid of the annoying backgrounds filled with crap.

Then I proceeded to my favorite cemetery and the fog was even thinner by then, so I drove through the grounds but didn't stop. There was no need. I really got what I wanted there days before and the mood wasn't right. I felt satisfied and thought getting home sounded real nice, with a few Detroit stops on the way, of course. As I was nearing home, I saw Christmas decorations going up. There is one house not far from me that junks up their yard (they have at least a double lot, perhaps a triple) with overkill decorations, Santas and scenes everywhere. He has been doing this for years. He wouldn't let me on the grounds (but he did tell me to come back when he was all set up) and I didn't want to tell him that I preferred the in-process stage. With all sorts of things laying around, waiting to be positioned, I had a much better chance of finding something odd. I do prefer the oddities in the world. I found a few but one really stood out. It was a baby Jesus that had some sort of cord. Maybe it lights up or something. It was laying on what looked like a bench and right in front of a main front-of-the-house decoration, a wall of carolers. Baby Jesus had some sort of wire wrapped around his little body a few times but it reminded me of bondage. I got that, and a good one of it. Another that caught my eye was a Santa climbing a tree with a Santa in a sled on a roof in the background. I took quite a few exposures and went home feeling satiated. I got most of them edited and ready to go before I had to go in to work for four hours. Friday is usually a free day for me but I had to reschedule clients because of the holidays. It was okay, really.

And now I'm home, feeling a little burned out about DA. I have plenty to submit but I just do not feel into it at the moment. I'm not sure why. It's not the photography as I'm way into that still. In fact, one of my clients owns a few businesses in Detroit and has some pretty old industrial equipment at one of the buildings. He invited me to come down and photograph it, and I'm definitely taking him up on that. Some industrial machinery, with a touch of rust, might dress things up a bit. I'm looking forward to it. I asked him if I could bring down some naked female models to pose with the equipment; he did not think that was a good idea.

About the DA burn out, I know one contributing factor is how dysfunctional it has been lately. New submissions do not show up on our pages for hours and hours. I do not like that. Yes, eventually it all gets there, but I want it posted immediately like it is supposed to do.

My DA accounts are going well, though my cemetery dead account is a bit slower than I'd like. I scan the new submissions every day for new cemetery photography and there seems to be a lull in it these days.

Yikes, I have SO much material to post to my DA account, I just know I'll not get to it all, and I keep adding more.

Tomorrow is a mostly no-shoot day but Sunday is open.

Thanksgiving Was No Turkey

2006-11-23T20:58:00.000-05:00

It was another decent day for photographs. I wasn’t doing so swell myself, but we won’t go there. I got out late and considered not going at all, but after I got on the road and snapped a few pictures, it helped get my mind off other issues. Had I gotten a decent night’s sleep, I would have hit the road early. I’ve had good results in the past on holidays. Yeah, it’s Thanksgiving Day. We should be thankful we were able to steal all this land from the Native Americans, I suppose. I don’t ‘celebrate’ it and am pretty low key about the whole event, what it stands for, etc. What it stands for in my eyes is a bit different than most others. No, I’m not Native American.

I hate holidays, all of them.

It was sunny and warm today, considering the time of year. I think the temperature hit 60° and even though strong light is a no-no for photography, I do swell with it. Why, I do swell with anything that breaks the rules.

Today was a clean up day. I had a few reshoots. One was a dilapidated apartment building with a ‘For Sale’ sign in close enough proximity that I could ‘borrow’ it for my photo. No, not move it (I don’t do that) but position it so it seems to be for the building, fire destroyed and all.

I’m making a lot more eye contact with the citizens these days, and most of the stares are not especially comfortable. Maybe they were always there but I just did not make eye contact so I did not see. I won’t back down and stare them right back as long as they want.

No cemeteries today. I have so many images to go into my cemetery account that there really is no point. If I get some sleep tonight, I might go out early as I heard the weather man use the magic ‘f’ word, fog. I get along swell with fog. I did a few more churches, too, which is all part of my ongoing Detroit church project. There are just so many churches in Detroit. The city survives on faith of some sort since life is hard here. I may find a few especially impoverished churches and actually go visit them during services. I will check with the director first about taking pictures. Maybe I can’t shoot actual people. That would work since I usually do not like people in my pictures anyway, just like in my life. It’s funny that I have been living in my apartment for about five years and only one person other than my family knows where I live. J I love it.

DA was poopie today, and yesterday. I can’t believe all the time-out messages I get, sometimes nearly every other attempt to go to another page or just refresh the one I’m on. I pay the cable company a lot of money for moderately fast Internet and DA humbles me, showing me what it’s like to run a phone connection. Right now it’s working okay but the items are not showing up in my gallery. I have so much to submit.

Friday is a shooting day for me, when I have gas. Gasoline. However, because I couldn’t work today, I will do so tomorrow and I have a lot of projects to get done for various people.

I’ve been doing well lately with the images and hope it keeps up. When the snow starts, especially the light dusting, I’ll re-hit the cemeteries. They’re always quite lovely with a light dusting of snow.

Time for bed soon. I sure hope I fall asleep fast…and stay asleep. My neighbor is a substance abuser, mostly drinking and crack, and does odd things in the middle of the night, like taking a shower. Our plumbing isn’t insulated so it sounds like a train is roaring through the bathroom. I keep out of his way and mind my own business.

No crack for me, thanks. You can have the beer, too.

Fog Fog

2006-11-22T13:47:00.000-05:00

What an incredible day today, photo-wise. I left early this morning to go to the market and get a few items I need for tomorrow, to beat the rush for Thanksgiving shoppers. As soon as I got out the door, I saw frozen dew on the lawn and thought that might be a nice touch for some cemetery pics. After scraping the frozen car windows, I went back in and retrieved all my camera gear. (I never leave the house without at least one camera, but I was thinking all three would be good to have today.) About a mile from the house I noticed some fog. Then, as I kept driving, it got thicker. And thicker. It took me about twenty minutes to get to the cemetery and once there, I was in heaven. This is my favorite of all cemeteries, probably the one I've extracted my best shots from. It is a sad place to be visit because it has been heavily vandalized, but that state of affairs makes for good pics. I parked and got out and roamed.

My, what a cherry pick for me. There were images to be had everywhere I turned. Statues, busted grave stones, and just the fog in general created such an impression. I had a field day in there, and after deciding that too much of a good thing can be bad, I left and roamed a bit on my way home through areas of Detroit. I dipped down into a rather challenged area and was stopped, taking pictures of a church. A guy was walking his dog and walked past me and said something I didn't hear at first. "Don't you go taking pictures here!" That's what he was saying. He probably thought I was some rich suburban kid (though I don't drive a new car) coming to take some pictures to show his cracker friends back in the suburbs. This guy doesn't know me, doesn't know what I do with the pictures, and if he did, he'd probably still want to shoot me. He kept going off about me taking pictures and I just starred him in the eyes and didn't back down as he walked by me bitching. I probably shouldn't do that on the streets because there are an incredible amount of guns on the streets. But I think it is important to not act afraid. I also did not think it was a wise thing to take the guy's picture. He wasn't anything special to look at, from a photo POV, and I saw no reason to piss him off even more. I can understand how he feels somewhat.

After that I headed north and avoided the eyes of the drug dealers and whores on the way back. They were out in numbers. I hit one of my spots on the way back, the one where I shot Street With No Name yesterday, which became a momentary favorite for a few minutes.

While in this neighborhood I found a house down a more secluded street (this area is arranged with a series of one-way streets and it is hard to get around in there.) This house was another wreck, but there was writing all over it, a message to Rayland. She was gone. Dead. There were teddy bears hanging from the house. It was a sad vision. I took a few longer views and a close up. I'm sure I'll post those in the next few days. While I was shooting this, a rather weathered looking old man stepped up to a fire hydrant and took a leak. I should have asked him to pose for me, dick in hand. LOL. Actually, that would not have been a good idea. He might have been horny and thought I was interested. That thought feels like, in my head, one of those nasty vile bile burps that burn the windpipe. I've had crack whores down in Mexicantown pop a tit out on Sunday morning one day. She probably needed some drugs bad and thought she'd get some busy that way. The streets were disserted and she was very nasty. VERY. As I drove off, I thought about it and decided to turn around. No, not for that but I was hoping she'd pop it out again. I was going to whip out my camera and snap it. When I got back there, just moments later, she was gone. Maybe someone else saw her showing me her wares and they wanted some for themselves. Another mental bile burp.

Yesterday I also posted my best ever shot of a charred house, Crisp. I hit it just the way I wanted and got the exposure I needed to show the detail I wanted to show. It was a very satisfying shot. And I got other decent photos yesterday, too, but am going to add them slowly since I am trying to keep my gallery manageable. It is difficult for a obsessive/compulsive like me.

I decided to come home and check my swag and on the way, by the time I hit the 'burbs, the sun suddenly came out, out of nowhere, and the sky was immediately bright blue and it was amazing how from a state of fog how everything was suddenly crisp clarity. It was a zen moment, for sure.

I am extremely pleased with the photos I got today, and one in particular might well be the BEST photo I have ever taken. It was perfect, right off the memory card. I try to avoid cropping pictures, and spend extra seconds behind the lens trying to get it the way I want from back there. When I got this one photo ready, I couldn't believe it. I may hold back a few days before I post it. I got so many really nice shots in the cemetery, I'd rather build up to it. Maybe I can get some people interested in this series. These are going into my 'dead' account, for sure. I'm anxious to get them going. In fact, I really liked an earlier pic and tried to download it to DA. It took forever and the site timed out a few times in the process. After about five minutes, I finally got it loaded and when I went to check it on my front page, it wasn't there. And it wasn't in my gallery, either. It is a spectacular photo that I think could have attracted some new viewers, so when I didn't find it there, I deleted it and will download it later, when it will actually be in my gallery right away. I have a Christmas picture for my 'dead' account tomorrow, a Celtic cross and a wreath. It is a photo I've never posted, one I found in my archives as I continued sorting through my archives. So maybe I'll get a chance to post this golden goddess later today. We'll see.

It was definitely one of my best shooting days. Besides all the new images I found, I had a great time. I adore fog. You better believe I'll be up early tomorrow morning checking for more!

Mama Said There Would Be Days Like This

2006-11-21T07:56:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a bust for pics. I forgot about those days, driving around with only modestly appealing stuff to see. It wasn't an official 'shoot' day for me, but I just wanted to dip into the city and see if anything was popping. I do have a back-burner mission actually, trying to find some shots of Detroit that are upbeat and show stability and growth. At one point Detroit had a population of about 2 million people. I didn't go down into the worst of areas. Is that why I didn't find anything? No. Sometimes either there isn't anything exciting to see, or perhaps my eye isn't working in the way that finds me subject matter.

I continue my tedious task of going through thousands and thousands of my photos, trying to cherry pick the best. I'm not real big on these menial tasks. :|

I have quite a bit of material and I'm trying to keep my gallery trimmer than last time, when it burgeoned to an insane 900 photos. Ironically, what I delete is often the photos I like best. I also forgot about that ongoing conflict I have with the people who view my stuff, viewers wanting the sensational images and passing over the photos I feel more personal satisfaction for having taken. I do enjoy working the city and like that feeling of danger. Possibly the most dangerous situation I was in was when I was trolling through a burned out neighborhood about nine o'clock on a Sunday morning. It's pretty isolated that time of day, with most residents probably still sleeping off the drugs and alcohol from the night before. Two guys in a car were trying to get my attention in a very big way. The neighborhood had an abundance of stop signs, just about every block. Whenever I pulled up to one, they tried to get alongside me. I sped off. We repeated this harrowing drama for about six stop signs as I was trying to get to a main street, near a location that stores new cars, with security guards on duty. As soon as I hit that street, the two guys retreated and disappeared. The way I figure, they didn't want to stop me and talk to me about Jesus. I am figuring they wanted to rob and car jack me. Maybe shoot me, too. Who knows? I am very lucky to have gotten out of that most precarious situation.

I later had a second similar incident driving down an industrial area of the city, a charming little street called Mt. Elliott, heading into Hamtramck. This car chased me down and I did some dangerous driving to avoid finding out what they wanted with me. If they were drug dealers, since I obviously was not interested, I would think they'd leave me alone. But they didn't.

I should get a license to carry a gun. But I'd probably use it and one thing I figure is the authorities don't allow digital cameras in prison.

Yesterday wasn't that exciting. It was just a day when I drove around and didn't find anything interesting to photograph.

Wintry Sunday 19 Nov

2006-11-19T20:55:00.000-05:00

Today felt like winter. In fact, it snowed. I went out early with on a mission: reshooting one of my photos from a few years ago. I wasn't sure if the shot would still be there, a photo of a gravestone from 80+ years ago that was placed near a tree, and over the years, the tree grew around the stone. I'm sure this isn't an unique photo, but it was decent and it attracted a lot of attention when I had it in my DA gallery the first time I was there.

I'm going through all my archival photos, fetching out what I think are the better ones, and I'll see what I have. My two main categories are Detroit streets and all my cemetery photos. I started a second gallery at DA featuring only cemetery photos. I'm sure glad I decided to do that, even though it's inconvenient. When I see a cemetery photo that I want to comment on, I have to switch into this account to leave the comment. And when I'm in my 'dead' account and I see something more appropriate for my main, I have to switch or make notes to go back later. I'm big into networking, and besides, I enjoy sorting through the photos that come parading through DA. There sure are many, many talented people out there. Our modern equipment makes it so easy to just focus on the content of the photo, and getting 'close' is good enough, with all the fancy-ass photo editing software out there. My Dead Gallery.

It was cold today and when I got out to the cemetery, I realized I did not have gloves. What I do have is carpal tunnel syndrome, really bad in one hand and starting up in the other. It was very bad today. The pain and numbness (yes, contradictory but true) was too much. A few times I just had to drop everything and wait for my fingers to recover feeling, waiting for the pain to subside. I few times I could barely cock the shutter (auto-focus) because I couldn't feel it. I get so frustrated when it gets this bad. I don't know why it, the CTS, flaired up again recently; it has waken me a few times in the middle of the night, from the intense pain and numbness. And a few of those few times, I never did get back to sleep that night. It's difficult functioning on just a few hour's sleep.

I got there and the photo was still good. Even the broken cross top was still there, after two years. Objects get moved around in this cemetery. I made note of that in one of my earlier entries a few days ago, the moving crucifix that went from leaning against a stone to getting implanted on top of another. I posted a photo the other day in my 'dead' account of a scribing angel on a headstone with no head, getting some sort of transplant, just a chunk of cement, glued in place with Gorilla glue. And there's that prosthetic hand affixed to a large angel grave statue that is in my main account. I chose not to move a few cemetery pics from the main to the 'dead' account.

This cemetery has two sections on one side of the street and even a newer second half across the road. This is one of my favorite cemeteries for pictures. I walked further down the lawn and saw so many vandalized stones. It is really pathetic. Someone thinks this is funny? Toppled stones are everywhere. I walked further and hit a streak of gold: a Jesus statue about 4+ feet high without a head, and the head was laying right next to it on a large tombstone. These are the sorts of things that make my trips worthwhile. I like the offbeat, the unexpected, and this fit that. I shot quite a few, trying to envision what would be the best way to illustrate the situation, the connection between both parts. Normally I do not 'think' while I shoot but this one did kick in my mental activity. I looked around a bit and found some more photos, but it was too cold and a few cars had been going through the cemetery, and that makes me nervous. The place is unguarded and few visit these graves anymore. I don't think they've had any new residents in quite a while. I really wanted to explore the main area some more, but my hands were shot. So I left and roamed just a bit on the way home, picking up a few stray city shots here and there.

It was still early so I headed into a Starbucks for something hot and to write in my journal, the one I keep that records more detail of the exact locations. While there, I kept thinking about the visit and decided I'd take a second try.

By the second trip, snow was falling and the wind was gusting enough to pull on the umbrella I was trying to hold in place as I shot, trying to keep droplets off my lens. It was so difficult that I threw down the umbrella and camera monopod I always have (as a weapon, not as a tool...if someone sees that I have an object that looks hard and dangerous, I hope it gives them second thoughts of wanting to mess with me) so I could get my shots. I found other shots, too. Some worked, some did not. I will go back one day and finish up, try again.

I harvested a few really good shots today and a few mediocre as well. Getting a handful of photos worthy of sharing makes for a good day.

MY ARCHIVES

Now that I have a new computer, I thought it would be a good time to evaluate my photography, see where I am, what I have, and if sorting through it inspires me to do something more with it. Perhaps I can make up a special book of my best photos and get a few printed. A friend told me about a place that does that. It is not cheap, but it would be nice to give such a gift to a few special people in my life.

I'm overwhelmed going through thousands and thousands of pictures. Yikes...have I taken that many? Over a year ago I figured I had something like 23,000 photos on my hard drive. As I sort through them, I see how much my work has changed. Many that I thought were good then do not pass my marks of approval any more. But it's hard to toss them aside, but I must be brutal and only focus on the cream of my crop. At a point, even after sorting through what I thought were some good photos from my Friday adventures, I felt totally inadequate as a photographer. Twice I have shown a small representation of my work to 'professionals' and failed to draw even a few small words of encouragement. Maybe I am mediocre, but I feel driven to go on and do what I'm doing. I had to stuff those feelings of inadequacy down for now and just go out and shoot, damnit.

That's about where I'm at.

One of my DA watchers asked me if I go into these buildings I shoot and I said no, which of course drew a 'I would if I was there' type comment. Yeah, I think of this guy sitting on his ass in his French home, thinking there's nothing to what I do. I'm sure he'd shit in his pants if he had to go into these places by himself, but from behind his computer screen, sure, he'd go in. I know a few people whom I'd consider risk-takers who wouldn't dare go where I go to do what I do. I blew off the comment the first round but thought about it some more and I found myself feeling annoyed. So I wrote back to this guy, listing the crime statistics for Detroit for 2004. I also conveyed a few of the times I was nearly attacked while on the streets. Maybe that will give him something to think about, but probably not because somehow, thousands of miles away, in his eyes I'm a chicken shit.

Thurs 16 Nov

2006-11-16T16:30:00.000-05:00

It was a cold, wet day and I decided not to go out for shots. Maybe it's a good day to stay IN for shots, but I don't drink.

I did manage to find some images for both galleries. I just hooked up my aux. hard drive and have my entire archive of my work. Damn, when I started out I had no idea that I would ever want to print any of these and many of my good early shots are, well, shot. After editing them, I saved them in the format I used for submission: small. Oh well. The only regret is that some of these areas are now gone and I can not take another shot at them. It all started out so innocently, and I had no idea how much I would get into it. I'm separating them for now into two groups, the cemetery and the city photos. When I get them all together, I'll see what I have.

It was retro day, with the "House of Joy" going into my main account, and three older images going into my cemetery photo account, two of my better cemetery shots.

My hand is doing me in: I have carpal tunnel syndrome and it has been acting up lately. It wakes me in the middle of the night, the intense numbness and sometimes pain. So I'm riding the day and evening on fumes. CTS affects my photography because the hand I have it in (worse) is the one I use to snap the shutter button. Sometimes I can't feel the button very well, and other times I have trouble gauging when I've pushed it down half way (the focus and metering function.) Sometimes when I'm out shooting I feel like I'm only working on half my pistons.

I will shoot on days like today but the cold kept me away. I think there are possibilities for photos on any day, any weather. That reminds me, I have to get to work on my notebook of places I want to shoot, mostly revisit and shoot again.

I still have to retrieve what's on my HD of my dead computer. There are some photos, but mostly files I need for work.

Tomorrow is supposed to rain again and Friday is a day I usually go shooting.

I'll wait until tomorrow to make the decision of what I will do.

Wed - 15 Nov

2006-11-15T09:38:00.000-05:00

The month is nearly midpoint. The elections shocked me. It seems just too many of us pissed-offers showed up to vote for the slimy neo-conservative scum to steal it. Now, let's see what the new guys do. I'm not a Democrat, but I definitely want some changes.

Enough on the political scene. Since the elections, I haven't been quite as interested.

Back to photography.

It has been fun to get back on the streets of Detroit. I have such a rare opportunity for shooting. I seem to be in a stage of reinventing myself behind the camera, and it is quite exciting. I fell into some ravines when it comes to approaches to scenes and it is nice to break out some. The fun part of all this is the self-invention. I teach myself and that's the only way I'd have it. A few months ago, a professional photography friend urged me to promote my photos and I contacted a man in this area who has worked his way into a position of prominence regarding Detroit photography. I sent him a link to my work and he wrote back that he found it uninspiring but if I would be interested (and probably pay him A LOT of money) he would take me on as a student. I froze. When I thawed I went and looked at the work of this great, great master photographer and I stopped and scratched my balls, then my head. What I was looking at was not the photography of a great master. At best, it looked mediocre commercial work (what he does.) I don't know, maybe I just don't have the eye, but that reaffirmed in me that I need to follow my own way.

I told him I'd get back to him on that.

What a jerk.

I have no idea how 'good' my photos are. I don't think they're great but I know they are good. That's good enough for me. My ego isn't behind the lens when I release the shutter.

I'm so pleased with my decision to break off and do a separate cemetery gallery. I went out yesterday specifically for some cemetery photos and visited a newer half of a cemetery I visit frequently. This newer half did not have that much that interested me the first time I drove through it a few years ago, but a new run through was worth it. I found Flowers to Spare there, a trio of ground plates with dead and not living flowers. I also found a section of the graveyard that housed about four large stone rectangles. I'm figuring these are uncut headstones. Blank is what I captured. And on the way out, I found this odd crucifix which I call Upwards Mobility. It is an interesting shot that I took as an afterthought as I drove out.

My late morning appointment canceled on me so I stayed out longer for images, driving through Detroit as I often do. I don't really have much to add to what I said about them in my main gallery. HERE.

Changes at DA

Hmmm...a new process for submitting work. It is a one screen thing which is really nice, and I like the way it limits large views to a set size. My work is my own and I really do not appreciate people stealing it. However, I don't think it's the sort of stuff that people would steal. I noticed at the bottom of each submission there are checked boxes about the user's agreement and terms. That didn't warm me up at all. I don't trust DA. There was talk before about them selling rights to all our work to a third party who would buy those rights. Who owns the art if such a thing happens is a bit unclear to me, but considering how the little guy has been getting screwed left and right these days, I don't think it's good for us. When Spyed jerked Jark out of his position, many many red flags went up in my mind. I dropped out of DA for over a year because that is just wrong and unethical, and I certainly would not trust a person who would do something like that. Would DA make a sweet deal and sell the site to someone commercial? I sure think so. Look at what YouTube did. (Hey --- does anybody else watch thehill88 there? She has the best facial gestures. I don't even mind so much that they're fake.)

Sunday Sun Day

2006-11-13T09:51:00.000-05:00

The sun was bright yesterday.

It sure feels good to be out and about again. I was telling a friend, I wonder what I will do when I run out of money for gas? If I can grow my balls bigger, I might try a series of photos from on a city bus, shooting people on the streets. I bet it has been done before, but that won't stop me. Hell, sex has been done before but that doesn't stop us from doing it again.

Yesterday was an interesting day. I did manage to capture a few images, including one from a new series I'm doing on Detroit churches (haven't posted it yet.) I had a few 'didn't quite work' images, too but that's fine...I'll take them back to the drawing board and rethink how I want to shoot them. I have to confess, when I'm out on the streets shooting, I'm nervous as hell. I stick out like a sore thumb. People watch me. Sometimes I watch them. A common occurrence is to see people sitting in a parked car, just sitting. I know in the whore areas where I shoot that pimps do that, keeping an eye on their business interests. It happened again yesterday when I was shooting a sign on a church. it's just unnerving to have all three of my eyes open at once. I'm constantly turning around, jerking about, probably looking like I need a fix.

Fulcanelli-is-Dead
I have moved all the cemetery shots from my main account over to my new 'cemetery only' account. I felt like a creep doing it because some of the watchers had selected a few of them as favorites. However, I did notify them, and give them the new location, so I hope they don't come and throw overly ripe tomatoes at me while I'm shooting on the streets.

Whores - EVERYWHERE, and Cemeteries, too

2006-11-10T20:37:00.000-05:00

Today was a photo day for me. I'm slowly getting back into it. No, actually 'like gangbusters' would be more apropos. I had some business on one side of town so I decided to focus my photo hunting there. It started off slowly but then things heated up...when I hit a neighborhood with beaucoup des burned homes. As it turned out, today was more of a residential shooting day, roaming through neighborhoods rather than on commercial main streets. It really is painful to see so many homes destroyed, and I have to wonder why someone chose to put a match to these homes? The homes that go up in flames are, as far as I know, vacant. However, around these abandoned homes are homes alive with people and families, with working people trying to etch out a living in today's extremely difficult economy. Sure, I know Dubyah points out that the economy is doing well, but he really means his rich-ass friends to get even filthier richer working the stock market. (Wait...you said 'no politics'...)

Whereas in Detroit the streets are often abandoned (because businesses still in business are so sparse) the streets of where I visited today had a steady stream of traffic, loiterers, drug dealers and girls working the streets. I think the dealers and prostitutes think I am there for what they are selling. I do not make eye contact as I do not want to encourage them to strike up a conversation. "We" have nothing to talk about, "we" have no business. Men roam the streets, even the side streets and sometimes it seems that everyone of them has drugs to sell, or perhaps with a phone call, a date. This is eerie for me because all my life I have lived in middle class neighborhoods. Wait, except for my college years, but we won't go there.

I drove by Lucky's Coney Island and was slowing down to survey the situation and see if I wanted to stop for a shot. A young lady was propped up against the wall of building nearby, scanning the traffic, honing in on men who might be wanting a 'date' before lunch. Even fifty yards away, our eyes connected for a split second. I was wondering if I could get a photo of her and she was wondering if I had any money. I looked away instantly. But she kept watching me, waiting for a sign. I drove by Lucky's and turned down some side streets to double back for a second pass. After documenting a few burned out homes, including one I posted today, Front Row Seats, I got back on the road for another pass and there she was, right outside Lucky's. I sure wasn't feeling lucky. I kept going and explored down a few more streets and about ten minutes later tried again. She was gone. I stopped and got my shot and got the hell out of there. I don't like working the streets when other people are working them as well.

While I was poking around on the back streets, I saw something that did not make sense at first. A definitely middle-aged man (maybe in his mid-late fifties) was walking up to a house with a definitely way younger girl (maybe in her early 20s.) There was something odd between them. I pulled into a driveway to turn around and headed back down that street and as I drove by them, the girl started walking out to the curb and was yelling something at me. She didn't seem too happy. Then the light bulb went off...in order to earn their wages, a prostitute has to have a place to fulfill her contract. There are certainly an abundance of unoccupied homes in the area. Yeah...this old coot was getting himself a lunch snatch, I mean snack. LOL. I'm not sure why she was yelling at me. I have wondered where they 'do it.' Now I think I know.

Whoring has to be hard. I've never talked to a whore before, at least not one that I knew was a whore. Renting a woman's body does not interest me, but I really wish it was legal. It could be safer for all concerned, and people sure aren't abstaining from 'it.'

I did manage to get some good stuff, some images I'm looking forward to posting, but I didn't stay in that neighborhood much longer and headed out.

Before I arrived in this neighborhood, I did stop for a few photos of an abandoned building I had seen on my last pass through the area. It's an odd building, with battered windows and the remnants of a small fire sitting in the parking lot. Walking around the weeds to get my shot, a thin piece of some sort of wire got caught in the front of my shoe and as I kept walking and pulling it, it slowly sliced my shoe top loose from the soul. I nearly lost my soul in Detroit.

Cemeteries

Before that, I visited a few cemeteries in the burbs, heading in to an historic one that is nested between a six/seven story office building and some apartments. When I shoot there, I have to be very careful to angle my shots in such a way (or do close-up work) to avoid the modern environs. However, today I said 'screw it!' and shot Dead Cocks with both the old stone and the office buiding in view. And nearby, I spotted a 'new' cemetery I had never seen before, even though I have lived in this area all my life. It was right there, on a main road. Where the hell did it come from? I've no doubt driven those street before and failed to see it. This one was small, maybe a couple dozen gravestones, one of those 'historic' plaques with details about how settlers to the area were buried there, and a huge pine tree. One massive branch was bowed all the way to the ground. It was freaky, and I shot it but didn't get 'my' shot. I shall return. This little cemetery was seated right in front of a nursing home. How reassuring...to turn into a nursing home and see a cemetery parked out in the front.

After that, I headed further north on the same street to visit another historic cemetery I had seen many times, right next to a church. I never stopped before. This one was about the same size.

Fulcanelli-is-Dead

In the past, I have received numerous 'suggestions' to stop showing so much of my cemetery photos. I guess some people just don't want to see/think about that. I love to photograph in cemeteries and have visited all the ones in my area, the ones I know about. Cemeteries are peaceful. I think about all the people who have been here before us, how each one had hopes and dreams of some sort (well, most, at least) and how they lived out their lives eventually died. I think it is fortifying to remember the dead. I've had enough of the 'requests' to not post cemetery photos enough that it has diminished my enthusiasm about posting such pics. I rarely get comments on the ones I post now. Then it dawned on me --- open a new account dedicated to the dead, or rather to cemetery photos. I did, and even while I was loading up the first ten or so images, I started getting comments and 'favorites' right away. Sheesh. It is THAT easy. So I'll maintain two galleries for two different sets of viewers. Since I have one of those impulsive personalities, this will be perfect. My new gallery is Fulcanelli-is-Dead. HERE.

I had a photo I took yesterday that I really liked quite a bit, but I hesitated posting it in my main gallery. But now it has a home, right HERE. And it was even selected three times as 'favorite.'

I really feel alive when I'm being creative. And I haven't been feeling in touch with my inner photographer much at all this past year. Hopefully I'm coming out of 'it,' the spell of darkness. One of my dear friends pointed out to me how odd it is that when I'm stressed and down in the trenches, fighting demons just to survive, that I do absolutely NO photography. You have to know that my style of photography is largely cemetery photos, demolished Detroit, and an assortment of other offbeat topics/themes. One would think, dealing with the topics I do, that such photography would be cathartic, an emotional enema, and that I would want to engage my Self in it just to feel relief. I guess the point is I do not feel morid at all when I'm out doing what I do.

I believe that my photos individually do not blow people away, but the accumulative effect of watching my work for a while leaves an undeniable taste, like they are interdependent on one another and all add up to major stories.

New Images - Thoughts on the Critique

2006-11-08T07:37:00.000-05:00

The election is over and the vote wasn't flipped in the middle of the night. Bush is holding a press conference this afternoon. Maybe this is the big announcement that the entire country will now be under martial law and no dissidence will be tolerated. KBR (subsidary of Halliburton Corp.) has been busily building internment camps across the USA, so perhaps it is time to use them, to round up this band of liberals and get this country back on track. ;)

I have only become political recently, during the past year or so, and opted before then to avoid the news entirely. Nearly entirely.

I will have some sawdust on the floor here for a while. My computer died about six weeks ago and I have been working minus a few pistons here lately. I'm surprised by how dependent I have become on the almighty computer, for work and play. My own work work has suffered without one and my photo work has been difficult. I will not be able to access the data I have on three different hard drives for a while, too.

DA goes well. So many of the people on the watch list are no longer active at DA. I am trying to create a new group of friends and it is just a slow process. My subscription, that one week version, was about to expire and I decided to go ahead and buy some more time. The larger thumbnails alone are well worth the pennies a day. I just do not like supporting those hiding behind the curtain. We never found out what really happened to Jark, how it was that Spyed was able to have Jark ousted from power at DA. I found Jark on Flickr and wrote him, but he did not respond. Jark's mom, Bookdiva, is not offering any further information. I have no need/desire to plunge into DA politics, but I do believe in fairplay and if Spyed functions on the same level as a Cheney or Rumsfeld, then I would want to know that. Now it is too late because I have an asterick for the next three months.

I submitted a few photos yesterday afternoon.

Acid Rain Detroit is retro, from a few years ago. I still like this one. Last week I drove by this location and found that it has changed quite a bit. The same shot is no longer there, as also missing is a neat old house right behind the vantage point of this photo. That house drew a lot of comments from viewers noting that it reminded them of the house in the movie Fight Club. Lots of images I took are no longer available. I should gather all my photos of Detroit and see about getting a handful together and self-publish them in a book with some vanity press. I would like to do that with cemetery photography, too.

Ant Farm is another pic I could not take today. That building went down shortly after I took the shot, which is no surprise considering it is already in a state of demolition. I just realized that this photo and Acid Rain Detroit are just blocks from one another. This one reminds me of those ant farms. I think I had one as a kid. I really liked this photo and recall when I had it up in my first incarnation at DA, it didn't do as well with views and comments as I had thought it might.

Up - Up - Up is destined to be another one of those neglected photos of mine. I can see now it won't be viewed that often. This is one of those photos that I really like but I seem to be the only one who does. It's my little tribute to Walker Evans. I like his work quite a bit and when I see a photo like this one, it reminds me how much I have absorbed from looking at Evans' photos. This photo is pure geometry for me in an abstract sort of way, with many of the structures in the photo pointing upwards, with a dependence on the diagonal line. When I finished editing it, I just blank-mind-viewed it for a few minutes on my computer.

My sense of 'art' must be either different than most, or non-existent. My 'artsie' stuff doesn't do well at DA.

I do not regret coming back to DA. It is the best photo site I have run across, period. I tried others that had some good work but also had groups who played the 'critique' game, something that does not appeal to me at all. I am a self-discovered Zen photographer and sitting around discussing how others would have taken my shot hold absolutely nil interest for me. I like to view other's photos and keep my mind open and avoid the trap of thinking how I would have shot it. Some photogs want the criticism, the suggestions, as they seek out their own photo 'voice' but I have a voice that talks to me silently when I'm hunting down photos, and the one thing I avoid (knowing it would absolutely KILL my instinct) is having to think behind the lens. Okay, I confess...I've dabbled in meditation and worked consciously to close down my thinking process and just 'be,' in the sense explained in Zen literature. Quieting the often critical inner voice is my sweet spot, the place I reside when I'm getting my best photos. It is when I'm in the Zen Photo mind that I see the most interesting things, that ironies pop off the page and I just start snapping away, sometimes getting good shots, sometimes not. But I can decide all that later when I download my harvest.

Another annoying aspect of the almight 'critique' is who offers them. I have found some incredibly incompetent 'artists,' ones clearly just starting out, offering detailed critiques on the finer points of my pics (and often regurgitating the grid rules, or whatever they happened to pick up from others who participate in the 'critique.')

I don't follow rules and when I'm taking a picture, I am not thinking, and as I've already explained, do not want to think.

It will be good working on a newer, more powerful computer. I had lost the ability to transfer as my CD burning player had stopped working a few months ago. I would like to enlarge/mat/frame a few of my latest photos and see how they really turned out.

Today does not feel like a good shooting day. Besides, I start work earlier than other days. But after another cup of coffee and a shower, I might feel differently. At first, before I didn't fall asleep early, I entertained going out for some atmospheric shots as the weather man called for potential fog this morning.

Gotta love fog.

Casting a Vote, Casting Doubts

2006-11-07T15:16:00.000-05:00

The Election

It's a grey, wet day. I sat in a coffee shop watching large shards of water crashing to the ground from the front awning. It made it look like it was raining much harder than it really was, which was hard enough in its own right.

Today I wasn't in the photographic state of mind. No, today was exercises in futility: I voted. What's the point? The elections are rigged and in so many ways. Funny...before Bush stole the office of President, I believed such shinanigans were just not possible in Amerika, in a country that was a symbol, in theory at least, of freedom and fairplay. No doubt in one of his conversations with God, Bush got first hand instructions on how to play dirty and win.

Today I voted. I did last year and while I am not a Democrat, I did vote against Bush last election and felt confident that Kerry was going to win...until late at night there was a soft sound, a flip, and the elections flipped. I drank a few cups of coffee this morning before going in, just in case the machine I voted on was made by Diebold, just in case I needed to express myself in a more graphic way about how I felt about those machines. When the voter aide handed me a paper ballot, I gave a sigh of relief. After filling it out, I handed the ticket to another worker and he fed it into an ES&S electronic scanning machine. I chocked on that earlier sigh. ES&S...one of the culprits. Chuck Hagel, a right wing fundamentalist Christian, used to run that company. He worked hard to get those machines distributed in his home state of Nebraska. After campaigning hard to get his machines installed in Nebraska, covering 85% of the vote, he quit the company and ran for U.S. Senate in 1996. He wasn't expected to win. But lo and behold, when the tally was all counted on the machines he had lobbied so hard to sell to Nebraska, he had won, a huge upset.

That's interesting...

So the deed is done and now it's time to see what angle the Republicans will use to steal this one. Author Greg Palast (The Best Democracy Money Can Buy, Armed Madhouse) wrote an article in yesterday's Guardian UK about how they already stole it without the machines, but with purged voter registration lists, turned away voters lacking the 'right' ID, uncounted votes (there were a reported 3,600,380 uncounted votes in the 2004 election, according to the U.S. Elections Commission.) The name of Palast's article is "How They Stole the Mid-Term Election" by Greg Palast. It should be easy to find if you have a mind to read it. I also heard it was floating around http://www.rawstory.com/. Because such files are moved, I will not track it down myself now.

I went prepared to wait. One line for one voting district was very long and slow. I figured it must be a heavily Democratic area. LOL. My line was fast, in and out in fifteen minutes. I'm white and I live in the suburbs and there are lots of Republican candidate signs around everywhere. It Can't Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis was in my hand. It seemed the perfect book to read in line, if I had to wait. It's a story about fascist right wing religious Amerika. Here's what one reviewer at Amazon said about the book:

Surprisingly, Sinclair Lewis' darkly humorous tale of a fascist takeover in the US, "It Can't Happen Here," is not merely out-of-print, but also quite hard to find. As dated as it is (1935), its themes will be quite familiar to Americans today. It starts with the highly contested election of an oafish yet strangely charismatic president, who talks like a "reformer" but is really in the pocket of big business, who claims to be a home-spun "humanist," while appealing to religious extremists, and who speaks of "liberating" women and minorities, as he gradually strips them of all their rights. One character, when describing him, says, "I can't tell if he's a crook or a religious fanatic."

After he becomes elected, he puts the media - at that time, radio and newspapers - under the supervision of the military and slowly begins buying up or closing down media outlets. William Randolph Hearst, the Rupert Murdoch of his times, directs his newspapers to heap unqualified praise upon the president and his policies, and gradually comes to develop a special relationship with the government. The president, taking advantage of an economic crisis, strong-arms Congress into signing blank checks over to the military and passing stringent and possibly unconstitutional laws, e.g. punishing universities when they don't permit military recruiting or are not vociferous enough in their approval of his policies. Eventually, he takes advantage of the crisis to convene military tribunals for civilians, and denounce all of his detractors as unpatriotic and possibly treasonous.

I'll save it for the next election.

Photography

I have been brainstorming new ideas the last few days for photo projects and two came to mind. I already have hundreds of photos of visits I've made to cemeteries in this area. It might be fun to get them organized and perhaps build a website dedicated to that. And another project will involve churches in Detroit. Watch for these in my daily submissions at dA. Detroit and churches makes for some interesting work on my part. Other projects I'm working on is more writing on Detroit and my experiences as a visitor with a camera in hand.

Contact

If you need or want to contact me personally, please do so through my dA account. :)

Speaking of dA, if things there seem to be going smoothly, just wait five minutes and something will break and the whole site will descend into 'Read Only' mode. ;)

dA Downloads Monday, 6 Nov

2006-11-06T08:52:00.000-05:00

Four new downloads to dA this morning.

First off, a retro shot I took at Cranbrook Institute last year of an outdoor statue. It was windy that day and I was quite shocked to notice the spider webs on her face. So far, nobody has viewed it at dA. I thought someone would because she has large hard nipples (probably from standing out in the cold naked.) Web of Intrigue.

Next up was a scene I found on a vacant lot, two abandoned vehicles. Joy Farms. As I wrote on the description page, while taking this, and getting visually accosted by a pedestrian walking by me, after ripping off a few frames, I noticed quite a bit of activity inside the truck cab. Oops.

Third up is a partially demolished building I've visited a few times. I wrote up a little story about an earlier visit, and it's included in the description section of the photo. Grail Castle - Detroit. I played around with the saturation levels on this, right after viewing some pretty incredible photos (that look more like paintings) by a fellow dA-member.

And finally, Handwriting on the Wall. This is some graffiti that goes beyond a word or phrase. Interesting stuff to find.

Even though I initially reported that my first sweep through the city was unproductive, I am seeing that I can still find interesting stuff in Detroit, especially if I lower my sight and try not to focus on massive destruction. I just want quirky pictures, oddball things I find. And I also want to capture the soullessness of the city, not just this city, but a new soul-less-ness across the country.

That is my new mission.

LATER

This afternoon I went to a frisbee golf course park for some pics. I was driving by and saw that the entire ground was covered in leaves (it wasn't a few days ago) and the sun was out casting strong shadows. The land there is slightly hilly which makes for more interesting shadows. I did not find a decent autumn picture so that was on my mind, since autumn is MY season. This year was poopie, autumn-wise. I'm sure George Bush had something to do with it. I stopped and walked, crunching through the floor of leaves. The sound made it a far more enjoyable experience. I found my shot, of (how trite can one be?) a park bench, and it really worked for me. Benched for the Season.

Now maybe I can start thinking about one for winter...

Back in the Saddle?

2006-11-05T23:05:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking quite a bit about getting back in the groove with my photography. That means going into Detroit. I don't have a problem with that, but financial restraints put a damper on me because I burn a lotta gas in roaming around the city. Perhaps I'll go into the city just once a week, if that, and be a bit more frugal with my posts. I tend to overdue everything.

I got up plenty early, around 5 AM. After messing around in dA for a few hours, after a few cups of strong black coffee, I decided to head out. I was a little nervous because when I stopped going last year, things sort of crashed on me. I won't try to explain. At first I wasn't sure I really wanted to go, but I just kept the car headed in a direction that would take me into the city. As soon as I got in I noticed that one of the major streets had been totally reworked. Instead of a five lane, it now was two two-lanes with an island. It's amazing how a city can change in a year. I had no idea they were doing these changes. I meant it when I said I didn't come into the city at all.

Not far into my trip I started seeing things I wanted to photograph, some buildings, some graffiti. I had a road in mind I wanted to explore, one that used to be in major disrepair. It was still, but it hadn't changed that much. After that sweep, I headed down into the city, through a few major roads right down the center. I found some of what I was looking for and got busy snapping pics. I also revisited a scene I shot the other day, one of a church with a little side door on the front of the building. It was odd looking and had a strong geometric feeling to it. The shots I did the other day did not really work the way I wanted them to work. Today I did much better.

I have no big stories to tell. Nobody attacked me today. I wasn't shot. However, I did realize that I get a real charge out doing this, going to places I shouldn't go. I do get looks. I'm just hoping I don't find myself in the wrong place with the wrong person, someone who just isn't curious about what I'm doing, but someone who has decided to interact with me. I mind my own business when I'm shooting pictures. I saw a little church with patched steps and wanted to photograph it. This was still pretty early, maybe 9 AM or so. A cab was sitting right down the street from the church, maybe two houses down. A man got into the cab from one of the houses and both the cabbie and the fair were really scrutinizing me. I just minded my own business and they drove by.

I stand out because I'm a white guy and Detroit is largely a black city. I do not mean that absolutely no white people live there, but I think they tend to be in certain areas. So I stick out, poking around, driving slowly by, looking around contantly. Once I was tailed by a tactical police unit. I think they thought I was looking for either drugs or sex. What else would a white guy be doing in the city early on Sunday morning (Sunday has been one of my trip days), driving slowly, on the lookout, if not looking for drugs or sex?

I will write more about this, about being a white guy in a black city, in later posts.

dA was quite a mess this morning, with no new photos displaying. I thought it would be cleared up by the time I got back, but that wasn't the case. Finally around 3 PM things seemed to be back to normal. I posted a few pics, one of a small group of three homes, with power lines in front and dark storm clouds behind. Sitting Ducks. I got this one on Friday and really like it. It's a different perspective than just burned out/abandoned homes. I think it creates more the mood of some areas of the city. And I had another I submitted of a wooden building in desperate need of paint, set behind wrought iron bars. Restricted Area. This one, in B&W, is a bit more artistic, or so I thought, and I was hoping it would be more popular than some of my pieces. So far, it has been mostly overlooked. Sigh....

Last night I posted one I had been after for a while of a cemetery grave angel with a prosthetic hand added to where the stone hand had been broken off. I've been after this shot for a while and stopped in at that cemetery three other times in the past to get it. None of the previous visits gave me what I wanted, but this time I got it. a Helping Hand.

I ordered a new computer on Friday. Mine died about six weeks ago and I've been using my older computer. It has been really horrible. For one thing, it isn't powerful. And worst, it has issues. The mouse I use has a mind of its own. It works with a laser light and the mouse jumps all around the page. And something is screwed up with it's click setting and when I click to go back to a previous page, it goes back two pages. I need a computer for my real work and have been on hold without it. So it will be good to be back up to speed.

I have quite a few images to submit but I'm going to try and pace them. I wish me luck.

Getting Started (again)

2006-11-05T07:24:00.000-05:00

I'm going to keep an offline blog more up to date than the one I post on at dA. I like the privacy better here. dA will be good for matters specifically related to that site.

I'm back, back in the driver's seat literally. I quit pounding the streets of Detroit for photos for about a year. Too much was going on and the spirits of image getting had abandoned me during that time. I still took my cameras with me wherever I went for most of the year, but rarely took them out of the cases. I wasn't thinking photography.

We live in such dark, dark times, with a small band of extremely wicked people secretly, silently stealing our government. And the people are buying the bullshit. I am shocked by how stupid the people really are. There isn't a single thing these thugs are doing to make our lives better, and yet I see Republican candidate signs up everywhere. When I inquire as to what the party has to offer, I get back vague comments about the need to fight the war, about fighting it 'there' instead of here (bullshit), about gays marrying, about abortions. And in the meantime these thugs keep stealing our money, our rights and freedoms, and advance their own sick fascist agenda. Times are bleak. Where is the archangel Michael, with the sword that slain the dragon of England?

Detroit is different, and so am I. At first I didn't think I'd be able to do the streets again. I drove through the city a few times, areas that have given me many gifts of image, and much has changed in the year. For one, many of the houses I shot have been ripped down and in a few spots, new ones have gone up. These are still devistated areas and I'm wondering who the hell is buying these new homes? Who the hell is WORKING in Detroit? Slowly these areas will grow and flourish, or at least I bet that's the game plan. Some of these new houses are nothing short of bizarre. They're long and extremely thin. I have yet to get a really decent photo of any. They look like long truck trailers stacked two high. Step in the front door and you're already on the opposite side of the room. Perhaps even that small space is preferable to no space, or a home in near-death condition. What a shame because the old brick homes of Detroit are wonderful structures. I would much prefer to live in one of those (properly fixed) than a new sterile home. Wait, I'm not going to be living in either since I'm just a wee disaster myself from living on the streets.

Many areas have been cleared and much of the garbage is gone from the streets. Images will be harder to come by, that's for sure.

But what I'm sensing now from the city is desolation/abandonment. It is amazing to drive through the city and see so few people on the streets. So few businesses have survived that people have no need to be on the streets unless they have nowhere else to go.

That is often the case.

That soullessness is something I want to capture in bytes, so I have a mission now. That is, when I can afford the gas to drive around the town. The rest of the time, I'll continue frequenting coffee shops, drinking coffee, reading, thinking, writing, waiting for archangel Michael to come pouring from the skies to clean out that rat's nest in DC, so we can have our dreams back.

A Little About My Motives

2006-10-23T09:53:00.000-04:00

I suppose since I am going to make an attempt to renew my obsession with photography, that keeping a travel log-blog would be nice, too. I've done that before and it works out nicely for those who might be interested in the behind-the-scenes activity that goes on with taking pics.

For me, going out on an image hunt is more than just having a camera with me. It really is like hunting in a way, and I note that I am actually in an altered state-of-mind when I'm doing so, which is why taking along a shutter-buddy just doesn't work for me. I have had some really interesting adventures, hunting down images, mostly when I go south of Eight Mile and head into the city.

Detroit is my city, and is listed on my birth certificate as my home. I (sort of) grew up in Detroit and it was fine. Things changed in the city and eventually I moved out and got busy with other things and forgot about it. I had been hearing news reports of how the city was becoming a drug/sex den, about the homeless, and the devastation left behind when the automotive industry abandoned the area. When I got interested in digital photography around 2003, with camera in hand, I wanted to find some unusual subject matter (besides the cemetery images which have always fascinated me, even back in my 35mm days with my Minolta SRT-101) and on New Year's Day 2003, drove south of the border for the first time in about eight years. What I saw, even in the select areas where I visited, shocked me. The whole city was in pain, perhaps laying near death. Burned out houses stuck out like sore thumbs in all the neighborhoods I visited, and trash was abundant, peppering the landscape, along with abandoned tires, lots of tires. I saw abandoned car, striped cars perched on old tires, hood up, picked clean. I had had no idea it was that bad. The people seemed to be hiding, or maybe it was just the fact I was up and about at 8 AM on New Year's Day.

So I had a mission.

I had another photo site where I posted those pics and before I knew it, my gallery was nearly a thousand images (not all of Detroit, however.) Stuff happened, I left, and came here. Flickr hasn't been so good for me so far. I don't know what it is but I can't seem to carve out a little corner for myself here.

I'll post more as I get going but for now, this will do.